Week 20

 

20 weeks

I’m there.  I’ve finally reached week 20.  Actually, as I am typing this I am on week 21, but week 20 is what I want to focus on here.  Up until the 3rd month, I was wondering if it’d really happen.  If I’d really have a baby at the end of this.  Risk of miscarriage is so high before three months.  But, it seems that there is really a baby in there, that this is reality.  With every kick and wriggle, I am starting to believe I should start to prepare myself.  We’ve acquired a used crib that we’ll pick up in July, and I’ve surveyed the various bedding patterns.  My to-do lists are made, and I am trying my best to organize the whole house because I know that once my crying babe arrives, I’ll have an extra appendage and no ability to even eat or sleep, much less organize a pantry.    

I am simply loving pregnancy.  I feel good despite exhaustion and overwhelming mood swings.  (The Baby Story sends me into crying jags every time.)  Nausea gradually left me until one day I woke up and thought – Huh.  I feel okay.  When did that happen?

On June 15th we found out that  . . . . IT’S A BOY!!  For some reason, this makes things more real to me.  There is a little man growing inside me.  Amazing.  We haven’t chosen a name yet so as I watch my stomach rise and fall, pop and kick, I call him “little man” or “hey buddy.”  I talk to him and tell him how much I love him.  To keep growing. That I can’t wait to see him.